Monday, August 10, 2020

The Hazards of High Office


Mankowski contemplates the loss of his ear

       Igor Mankowski slumped backward into his chair as Peter the Famished stormed out of the King's Private Chambers bellowing for his lunch. The searing pain in his right ear meant two things; one good, one bad. Good, that the King had not shot him between the eyes (like the last Minister of War), the King rarely missed and would have reloaded if he had needed to! Bad, that his right ear would forever have to be hidden by his wig.

       The guards came rushing in right after Peter had left but Mankowski waved them away and pressed his handkerchief to his profusely bleeding ear, "It is but a scratch!", he protested as they offered aid. "I wonder if the remark about the Navy saved my life, or cost me my ear?" he thought as he sat contemplating the map on the table before him. The near-death experience had sharply focused his mind and he resolved to stop trying to solve all of the problems at once, to concentrate on the most important issue; the conquest of the northern third of Vienee. Dreams of his own Dukedom once more danced through his head , but he forced those thoughts away and aimed his formidable intellect at the situation on the ground.
       Frankly it wasn't good. Frozonia was once again in revolt, they were a recurrent irritant but not a strategic issue. The Freedonian expedition into the north (doubtless aided by Boozonian collusion) aimed to detach the area around Gruyere and gift it back to Boozonia in an effort to spark continuing problems in the north, this was a significant issue but did not change the power balance in the short-term. "Let it burn, indeed", muttered the wounded Minister of War as he searched through the troop dispositions seeking a way to pour even more soldiers into the effort against the Gluttonian capital. The Navy was performing beyond expectations but were in no position to render aid to the current effort, perhaps they could conduct coastal raids to tie down Proper-Mealer resources. Alternately he could rely on them to guard the southern coast as he stripped the rich southeastern lands of troops to strengthen the forces near Vienee. Seeking a larger view he turned to the gigantic wall-map of the entire Epicurean continent that hung at the eastern end of the chamber.
         Mankowski stood there for some time, holding his kerchief against he bleeding ear, mentally calculating march-times and distances, food and fodder requirements, balancing risks and rewards when he suddenly realized what was actually going on inside the head of Louis the Ravenous. He gasped and his knees buckled as he grabbed a chair for support, "Sweet Mother of God! They mean to go for the Canal! That is the object of the Freedonian invasion!" He turned and shouted frantically for his secretary, the guards and the wine steward.


Note on the Cheddar-Gouda Canal:

        The Great Cheddar-Gouda canal project had been one of Peter's favorite "secret" projects to improve his kingdom. Every summer for the last eight years the army held "maneuvers" on the great plain between the headwaters of the two rivers, these had consisted mostly of digging furiously at the line of the canal. The entire area was sealed off as a Military Preserve and the soldiers were told that they were conducting experiments in a new mode of fortification. Peter's ambition was to be able to move commerce (and his Navy) between the Middle Sea and the Northern Oceans, thus bypassing the middle-man position that Freedonia and Nylia held in the trade between the New Lands and the East. It would also allow him to move his navy between the seas saving him from having to maintain a fleet in the north and the south as had been done in ages past.


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